behind enemy lines a tale of Wizarding therapy
by pucky-ucky-wucky-bucky
Summary: Draco Malfoy, Vincent Crabbe, Gregory Goyle and Blaise Zabini are staying with the order of the phoenix for protection from Voldemort and share a house with Harry, Ronald, Hermione, Luna and Ginevra. arthur decides they need therapy. what more can be said
1. Chapter 1

Behind enemy lines; a tale of Wizarding therapy.

Say what!?

_Draco Malfoy, Vincent Crabbe, Gregory Goyle and Blaise Zabini are staying with the order of the phoenix for protection from Voldemort. They are sharing a house with Harry Potter, Ronald Weasley, Hermione Granger, Luna Lovegood and Ginevra Weasley. Arthur has come to stay for a while and has been living in a house full of teenagers with problems for a week._

Arthur's P.O.V

Once again I returned to the house to the sound of bickering teenagers. Is it so hard for them to just get along? But it doesn't matter anymore; I have come up with a solution that will save us a lot of stress and fighting… I hope.

"You filthy excuse for a pure-blood; I don't even know why you were sent a letter to Hogwarts in the first place!"

"Shut it Malfoy, at least _we _have a will of our own and don't grovel at the-man-with-no-nose's feet like your family!"

"I grovel for no one!"

"I think there are filleting groobles in the upstairs banisters."

"…"

"Umm, Luna; the banisters aren't upstairs, they're _on _the stairs."

"Who cares about the banisters; what the hell are filleting groobles?"

I walked in at this point; "please, just _stop _talking! We are having a meeting in the dining room." No one moved; "_NOW!"_

I watched silently as the ten teenagers gathered around the dining room table, I stood at the head.

"Now, I will make this very clear and there will be no arguing." _Right, yeah, in my dreams._

"We, well, more to say _you_, are having therapy sessions. I have chosen a therapist whop will come here at no extra cost and do his therapy sessions with you. I will be there at the beginning of them, and then I will leave and go to work. You had better behave or so help me…" I trailed off muttering under my breath. They all looked at me in silent shock before they exploded.

Ron- "dad, how could you!"

Harry- "therapy with _Malfoy, _oh, I don't believe it_!_"

Hermione- (uncertainly) "well, it _might _help… but I don't see why _I _have to go, I'm completely normal!"

Draco- "you have _got_ to be kidding me, being brought to this level by a Weasley!"

Ginny- "_DAAAAAAADDDD!_"

Blaise- "well, this'll be interesting!"

Vincent- "huh, why do I need therapy, I'm fine!"

Gregory- "oh, sure you don't Vince, cause everyone finds it necessary to eat at least five meals a day." That was sarcastic, well; maybe he's not as bad as I thought he was.

I decided to interrupt; "look, I know you don't want to do this, but it's really not up to you. Dr. Cross is coming here tomorrow morning at ten o'clock sharp." I paused, then remembered a piece of vital information; "oh, and by the way, he's a muggle, so, no magical references, but still be as honest as you can." And so, without waiting for an answer I quickly walked out of the room.

They'll deal.


	2. Chapter 2

_People, please review this time!! Pretty please?_

2. Meet the Doc.

Hermione's P.O.V

I was awake at six o'clock on the morning of our first therapy session; and yes, that _is _normal for me. I went downstairs to eat breakfast by myself, whilst coming up the resolution to wake everybody, yes, even the Slytherins', at nine o'clock sharp. In the next three hours I ate, got dressed and read pride and prejudice; I've always loved that book, it's sooo romantic how they don't like each other but it turns out that he's been in love with her for ages and then they get together…sigh… but, anyway; it was time to wake everyone up.

First stop; the Slytherins'

I walked in the room to find a very odd sight before me; the closest bed was occupied by the sleeping figure of Draco Malfoy, the next bed along had a sleeping Blaise Zabini in it, the next bed was empty and the next had Vincent Crabbe sleeping in it. but that was perfectly normal, apart from the empty bed, the strange part was the fact that Gregory Goyle was curled up sleeping on the carpet with a pink sleeping mask on, a blue bunny in his arms (a soft toy, not a live bunny), and he was sucking his thumb… I know, _sucking his thumb_. I always knew there was something wrong with him. I cackled a bit; this would be a veeeery interesting therapy session.

I tapped Malfoy to try and make him wake up; it didn't work. So I shook him, hard, harder than necessary I think, but whatever; it didn't work anyway. So I came to a decision that should wake everyone in the room up at once.

I screamed; loud. And I mean, really _loud_. The reaction was actually very amusing.

Blaise sat up in bed and yelled something about how the screaming ghost of manly hood was going to kill him; yeah, I don't know either.

Crabbe flailed around for a while yelling loudly and repeatedly; "where are the chickens?"

Goyle jumped to his feet and started running in circles screaming hysterically; "don't kill the purple fuzzy dinosaurs; they're harmless, _harmless I tell you!!_"

And Malfoy sat up in bed and clapped a hand over my mouth yelling in a rather gravelly, sexy *screeeeeeech* wait, no, I did _not _just think that. Draco Malfoy is absolutely _not _sexy, not one bit.

Then, to make it even better Luna burst into the room screaming "don't let the filleting groobles anywhere near you!"

Behind her followed Ron yelling "what have you done to Hermione?"

Followed by Harry screaming; "where are the death eaters?"

Followed by Ginny who yelled loudly; "SHUT UP!"

Everyone went quiet Ginny spoke again "Hermione, what just happened?"

I prized Malfoys' hand from over my mouth and smiled innocently, "just waking everyone up for the therapy session."

There was a collective groan from the group interrupted by Luna saying happily; "what time was the therapy session again? Cause it's about nine-fifty."

We all stared at her in shock then Malfoy yelled loudly; "ten o'clock" and jumped out of bed, closely followed suit by his friends. I couldn't help but notice that Malfoy was only wearing boxer shorts and that he had a particularly nicely toned chest. Then I realized I was staring and quickly looked away before anyone noticed. Although I could have sworn I saw Zabini smirking at me in a way that sorta said _wait till the therapist hears about this! _I groaned; silently of course. Then I left everyone to get ready.

Ten minutes later I was sitting in the kitchen with Arthur when the doorbell rang. No one else was downstairs yet, so when Arthur went to get the door I yelled at the top of my lungs; "HEYYY GUYYSS, THE THERAPIST IS HEEEERRRREEE!!" I heard some yells of anger, frustration, confusion, and annoyance echo down the stairs. But within a minute everyone was standing in the kitchen with me; even Malfoy who by the looks of things had been dragged down by his hair. In fact, everyone save me, Goyle and Crabbe (this may have something to do with the fact that they were both still wearing the same shirts as they had to bed and had just put pants on and shaved) looked worse for wear; Ginny's hair was knotted up so much that it was sticking up at a multitude of odd angles, Harry hadn't managed to get a shave in, Ron wasn't wearing any shoes and his hair looked like an orange birds nest, Malfoy's shirt was so hastily buttoned up that he had missed the majority of them and put some buttons in the wrong holes making his shirt completely askew, and Zabini had pulled his tracksuit pants on back to front. This was the sight that greeted our therapist's eyes when he walked into the room.

He looked slightly shocked at the vision in front of him; as well as the personal fashion problems we were all wearing varying degrees of anger, annoyance, embarrassment and dreaminess (Luna) all over our faces. After a few seconds of taking this in he entered the kitchen and cleared his throat before addressing us; "umm, well, my name is Doctor Cross, I am a fully trained psychologist and I will be your, uh, therapist for as long as you need me."

We then introduced ourselves and shook his hands; even Malfoy shook his hand which surprised me.

Then we all sat down around the table with him at the head and he said the magic words; "so, where should we begin?"

All us Gryffindors' pointed straight at Malfoy, all the Slytherins pointed at Harry. The therapist wrote all this down quickly before asking, "So Harry, Draco, tell me, why is everyone pointing at you two?"

They were too busy glaring at each other so I answered for them; "Well, you see, Luna, Ginny, Harry, Ron and I go to boarding school with Malfoy, Zabini, Crabbe and Goyle. We have been enemies since we started school."

He looked a bit shocked and asked "so, are you all the same age then?"

I replied again, "no, Ginny and Luna are 16, the rest of us are 17. When we were eleven we started at our school and became enemies with them," at this I pointed at the Slytherins, "Ginny and Luna came the year after so they've been enemies for a while as well."

"And why, may I ask, are two groups of enemies staying in a house together?"

I didn't know what to say, so I just stared blankly at him, Malfoy spoke instead, "well Cross, you see, we are all being hunted down by a mass murderer who gave potter his scar when he was a baby."

This caused uproar, "Malfoy YOU IDIOT!" that was Harry.

"Way to go D!" of course Zabini would encourage him.

"Does Draco mean Voldemort?" well duh, Goyle.

Ginny was silently fuming, Ron was turning red, Crabbe was staring at his feet and Luna was looking silently at the therapist, who, just for the record, was a delicate shade of puke yellow; interesting. Oh, and I was watching this thinking it was pretty funny but not laughing, well, not out loud anyway.

"so let me get this straight," the therapist looked a bit hesitant, "there are two groups made up by; Draco, Blaise, Gregory and Vincent, and, Hermione, Luna, Ginny, Harry and Ron. You have hated each other since you started at your boarding school and are now trapped in this house because a mass murderer is trying to kill you all."

We all nodded; "well, thank god I have all day." He sighed.

_How'd you like it? review review!_


	3. Chapter 3

3. Just the beginning

Hermione's P.O.V

Luna, Ginny and I were sitting across from Dr Cross waiting for him to begin. He had selected to take two separate groups; a boy group and a girl group. Malfoy deemed it time to become a 'gentleman' - "ladies first" was his comment. Harry and Ronald seemed to agree with him, which pissed me off to no end. But then, I guess, in therapy it's each every woman (or man) for herself (or his self)

Dr Cross cleared his throat "now, I understand that you are all on the same side of the line?"

We all nodded. I rolled my eyes, well, _duh._

"Well, I'd like to know if any of you have any problems, whether they are behavioral, emotional, anything at all." There was a long pause. I glanced at Luna who was looking at Ginny, who was looking at me.

Ginny spoke up; "Hermione studies too much. She has absolutely no social life!"

I growled at her in anger. What had I ever done to her! "Well I'd like to thank _you_ Ginevra Weasley for knowing what you really think of me! It's a pity you didn't tell me before; then I could've let you control me like you try to control everyone else!"

I could see her eyes sparking at me "I do not control people Hermione Jean Granger! That's a lie!"

"Oh suuuure you don't Gin. You just blow up in people's faces when they don't do what you tell them to do and start shooting off bat bogey hexes at everyone in sight!"

"Oh yeah! Because you don't control anyone!" her tone was starting to annoy me especially the sarcasm when she uttered that last sentence "threatening to hex Harry and Ron when they don't do their homework isn't controlling them is it!?"

Dr Cross was looking slightly sick by this point and decided to put in "I thought you two were on the same side here?"

We both stopped and stared at him. I was slightly ashamed of my behavior; I don't usually let my temper blow up like that.

"Oh yes, we are on the same side. But I think the humbogius blugules have infected them." Luna; of course.

Dr. Cross gaped at her. I came to the rescue; "umm, yeah, about that, Luna has a slight mental problem." Luna frowned at me, but the doc seemed appeased. That's when the laughter started.

I could hear all the boys laughing; right next to the door. I heard Malfoy say through his laughter "I always knew there was something wrong with her!" that seemed to start the Slytherins up again. I stomped over to the door and opened it before walking outside and closing it again. The boys looked at me nervously.

"You will all leave right now." I hissed at them. "There is absolutely nothing wrong with Luna! and I'll thank _you_" I rounded on Harry and Ron "for being so immature!" I really was quite worked up by then and the sound of Zabini sniggering behind me was the last straw. I spun around and slapped him across the face, hard.

He cried out in pain and I smirked at him triumphantly. "Now, GET OUT!" they all scuttled into the kitchen. I took a deep breath and walked calmly back into the lounge room.

Everyone was looking at me. I smiled and sat back down, "they're gone."

Ginny looked at me suspiciously then grinned and cried out "who'd you slap this time?! Was it Malfoy again?!"

I frowned at her, "no, Zabini."

She burst out laughing "he squealed like a girl!"

I started laughing too.

I'd forgotten all about Dr. Cross until he coughed to get our attention. "So, let me get this straight. Hermione, you focus a lot on your school work, and so, do not have much of a social life. You also try to make your friends focus on their school work as well, sometimes reverting to violence to make them. You also have a history of slapping your rivals. Ginny you are used to getting your own way, when things don't go your way you also revert to threatening people or hurting them. I understand that you are the youngest sibling and the only girl in your family. Luna, you are prone to strange outbursts and have a slight mental problem."

I glowered at him. He was way exaggerating for me. Ginny growled, though I think that he was completely justified in his accusations for her. Luna stared out the window. He took all that for confirmation. Personally I was glad he hadn't picked up on the fact that we kept referring to hexes. At least, not yet he hadn't.

He sighed, "well, you can go now, send in the boys please."


	4. Chapter 4

Here we go again.

Draco's P.O.V

I was still laughing at what Granger had said about Lovegood when they came in and said it was our turn. Seriously _she has a slight mental problem_! Who knew Granger had a sense of humor.

I strode into the room first, the other guys trailing behind me. I lounged in the biggest armchair looking idly unconcerned about everything. In truth I was quite looking forward to the whole ordeal. The humiliation, Priceless stuff that.

Dr. Cross sat down and looked worriedly at us, "so, where should we begin?"

I looked at Potter who was looking at Blaise who was looking at Weasley who was looking at Vince and Greg who were both fighting over a cupcake. No one said a word. I broke the silence.

"Potter has hallucinations."

He looked at me in shock "I do not have hallucinations!"

Yeah, sure. "Oh no, of coouuurse not - cause, you know, fainting all over the place and screaming about whatever happened to be happening in your hallucinations - that never happened at all."

Potter just stuttered at me. Bloody idiot.

"Yeah, well, Zabini is the biggest player I have ever met!" oh yeah potter, just change the subject.

Blaise grinned unabashedly "jealous potter?"

He just snorted "what's there to be jealous of?"

"How about my uncanny wit, my dashing charm, my blinding looks. What's not to love potter?"

"Everything" he growled. I noticed Cross jotting everything down as we spoke. Blaise decided to shove the spotlight onto weaselby.

"Well at least I don't have a hideous temper and blow everything way out of proportion like one red head I have the unfortunate luck of knowing!"

"I DO NOT BLOW EVERYTHING OUT OF PROPORTION, YOU LYING SCUM BAG!" oh no, not at all. Talk about acting before you speak.

"-Cough- sure –cough-"

Weasel spluttered in anger at us. "Yeah? Well, at least I don't bash people up like those two!" he said, pointing at Vince and Greg.

Silence.

Merlin those two can be stupid sometimes.

Vince looked up to see everyone staring at them.

"Uh, Greg sucks his thumb!" he sounded like he'd just won the lottery.

"No I don't! You eat too much!"

A clear voice came from outside the door. Granger, if I'm not mistaken.

"So does Ronald!"

I started laughing at everybody's faces, gees; I knew it would be priceless.

"OH, IN THE NAME OF MERLINS SAGGIEST Y-FRONTS. HERMIONE!!!"

I was snorting with laughter by this point, very unrefined I know, but Weasley got picked on by granger! One of his best friends, oh this is priceless.

Cross cleared his throat, no one paid any attention, by this time the room was full of bickering teenagers.

"BE QUIET!"

We all shut up, me letting out the odd snigger or two.

"So, let's see if I got everything. Vincent, you have eating problems and are prone to bashing people up. Gregory, you also bash people up and have a habit of sucking your thumb. Ronald, you eat too much and have a tendency to blow up at people. Blaise, you are a player and very confident in your physical attributes." I sniggered at that. "Harry, you are prone to having fainting spells and hallucinations. And Draco, no ones said anything about you yet."

There was an outburst of talking from potter and Weasley.

"He's an arrogant."

"Stuck up"

"Pureblood loving"

"Totally biased"

"Mean"

"Witty, intelligent, charming, incredibly handsome"

"Prat"

They glared at me when they heard my input. B started laughing. Dr Cross just stared at me.

"Draco, you are confident in yourself and your assets, but are prone to being over confident which results in the following accusations of being arrogant, stuck up, mean, biased and pureblood loving."

I glared at potter and Weasley, "hey, that's not fair; I don't care about blood status anymore!"

"You filthy excuse for a pureblood?" Stupid potter, why on earth did he have to quote that on me.

"Force of habit Potter"

They glared at me. Dr Cross cleared his throat again.

"Well, that's all for today. Tomorrow I will be back for a group session. For the next week you will have a set of exercises each of you will have to perform. GIRLS, PLEASE COME IN!"

The three of them walked in, snickering at something or other. Weasley glared at Granger as she walked in. She just sent a gorgeous smile his way… wait a second, Draco, you did not just think that. No, her smile is _not _gorgeous; no way in the name of Merlin can you think those thoughts. Its Granger for heavens sake!

"Here is your homework." I jolted back to awareness when cross started talking again. "Harry, as hallucinations and fainting is hard to cure just by will power I will bring you some pills tomorrow, as it is, Hermione told me that you and Ronald are very bad at doing homework and she often has to revert to violence to get you to do it. So, for the next week you are going to have to read which ever books she tells you to. Ronald, you are going t have to work to control your temper. You will have to solve any arguments or disagreements with a bargain or some other form of non-anger. The same goes with you Ginny. Hermione, if someone asks you to stop reading and do something with them, you must say yes, if it is a reasonable request, which will be judged by a neutral person if it cannot be decided. Blaise, you are going to have to spend at least 6 hours a day in the presence of a girl and for the whole week you are not to come on to them in anyway, whether it be physical or verbal. Vincent and Gregory and Ronald, you are all to go on a strict diet and Vincent and Gregory are not allowed to use physical force on anyone. Luna, you are going to withhold your strange outbursts as much as you can. And Draco, you are going to be nice to everyone, there will be no arrogance and no biasness at all." We all gaped at him.

"I have to be nice to them!"

"No suggestive comments at all!"

"A diet!"

"I have to read Hermione books!"

"You can't take me away from reading!"

"I'm not allowed to get angry at anyone, _while they're here?_ You've got to be kidding me."

Cross calmly ignored us and stood up, "I'll see you tomorrow for the group session and see how you're going."

Then he left. The silence was deafening.


	5. Chapter 5

What will we do with them?

Hermione's P.O.V

"Hermione, come here, I want to have a girl chat!"

"GINNY! I just want to read my book!"

"You have to come though; it's against the rules if you don't."

I slammed my book down on the table in frustration. If people didn't stop bugging me they would have one psychotic Hermione Granger in their midst.

I stormed into the kitchen where Zabini was sitting with Ginny. He'd been hanging around with her all afternoon; he seemed to think she was the most interesting girl around.

"Girl talk?" I said, raising my eyebrows in his direction.

Ginny smiled, "he's girly enough."

"I protest!" he cried out indignantly.

Malfoy walked into the room.

"Can I join in?" he sounded dead bored. I wasn't quite sure what he was aiming at so I decided for a change of plans.

"Change of plans!" I yelled loudly, Ginny looked upset; she brightened when she heard my idea, "boys, Luna! Come here, we are all going to play truth or dare!" Ginny let out a squeal of excitement. I agreed with her, I'm a sucker for truth or dare. Once everyone was assembled I summoned a vial of veritaseum and we all drank a sip.

"Now, we are playing the game where, if there is a truth, everyone answers it. So, who has a truth or dare?"

Blaise grinned at me maliciously, "Who is the hottest person of the opposite gender in this room?"

Ginny was first, she smirked at him, "Blaise, definitely." She edged closer too him, obviously aware of his boundaries. I was struggling not to laugh. "Your eyes are so enticing, and your smile is so gorgeous." She trailed a finger down his nose looking seductively at him. Zabini was freaking out, I could tell what he was tempted to do, but he couldn't kiss her, touch her, or make any suggestive comments. Ahhh, priceless moments. While I tried not to laugh, the rest of the group was staring at her in horror. Suddenly I couldn't hold it in any longer and burst out laughing.

"You should… see… faces… priceless… Blaise… can't… ahahahahahahaha." Everyone looked at me like I was crazy, then Malfoy looked at Blaise again and started to chuckle. Finally someone caught on.

Then I remembered that we were all under the influence of veritaseum. Suddenly I sat up and looked at her in shock.

"Ginevra Weasley! Why didn't you tell me?!"

She looked at me sheepishly. I shook my head, then notice I was next in the circle. I slowly started trying to edge backward out of the circle without anyone noticing. They noticed.

Ginny shouted, "Hermione Granger, who here, of the opposite gender, do you think is the hottest?"

I looked thoughtfully around the circle, I knew who it was of course, but I could pretend I didn't.

"Hmmm, I'd have to say… Draco Malfoy."

Everyone except Blaise gaped at me. He just smirked, well; he had seen me looking at Draco in the morning I guess.

Then the outburst came.

Harry – "gross, you can't be serious?"

Ron – "_Draco Malfoy_, that ugly little ferret?"

Ginny – "well, he is rather good looking… I guess."

Blaise – "I knew it!"

Draco – "well at least someone has good taste."

Luna was next, "I've always thought Ron was quite good looking." Could she get any dreamier?

Malfoy started laughing "no one thinks potter is the hottest!!"

Blaise chuckled along and even I let out a little laugh.

Then all the boys started looking at us girls.

Harry was next, "well, I can't say I like any of you as more that a friend, but, I'd have to say… probably Ginny, I guess."

Ginny grinned, "One point for Ginevra Weasley!"

Ron's turn: "Uhh, Luna. Definitely."

"Thank you Ronald. No one's ever said I was pretty before."

There was an awkward pause, then Draco. He was studying all three of us very carefully. I watched him, his expression gave nothing away. All eyes were fixed on him.

"Hmmm, I'd have to say… Hermione Granger." He smirked at me, mimicking my words.

There was a shocked silence.

"Well, it's nice to know that all of you expected someone to think I'm good looking." I said sarcastically.

Malfoy laughed at everyone's shocked expressions and looked expectantly at Blaise.

He was frowning, "I don't think I'm allowed to say."

"Why not!"

"Because, I think that would break the rules set for me by Dr Cross."

I nodded approvingly, "well then, I'll tell everyone for you, shall I? Great, Ginny Weasley."

He gaped at me, "how did you know?"

"You are very easy to read."

He spluttered at me for a while until he noticed Ginny beaming at him, at which point he smiled tentatively back.

I then looked around the circle.

"Where are Crabbe and Goyle?"

Everybody looked around in shock.

"Those sneaky little bastards, they aren't playing!" Ginny was about to go into a rage, I could tell, so I decided to step in.

"Gin, remember the rules, plus, do you really want them to play?"

"Oh, come on girls, they aren't that bad." Blaise stepped in.

"Okay, I'm getting bored here, who has a question or a dare?" I really was getting fed up.

Luna piped up "when was the last time you didn't wear underwear in public?"

We all gaped at her, I decided to go first.

"Last summer holidays." Everyone gaped at me, Malfoy smirked and wolf-whistled. I smiled innocently at him, "and when did you last not wear undies in public Malfoy?"

He frowned, "Uhh, I don't think I ever have…"

"You're kidding!"

He shook his head. Man, has he missed out on a lot.

Ginny's turn, "last day at Hogwarts for us."

Blaise looked incredulously at her, I laughed.

"I always wear boxers" said Harry, Ron nodded in agreement.

"I had to not wear mine for a day in second term of year 6 for a dare." Blaise, of course.

Luna spoke, "mine was in year four."

We all looked at each other, I stood up.

"Well, if that's all I'm just going to go read my book now."

I started walking towards the lounge room door but Ginny's screeches stopped me.

"I didn't say we'd finished yet."

Suddenly I felt all woozy and dizzy, "I don't feel so well." I said. I leaned against the wall for support as stars popped up in front of my eyes. "I think I'll just…" everything went black.


	6. Chapter 6

What the hell?

Draco's P.O.V

We all watched in amusement as Granger was denied access to her book. She really was the most attractive; I can't deny it now the veritaseum made me admit it. I must say that I liked it very much when she said I was the most attractive, I didn't expect it from her. Although Blaise did, I wonder why. Suddenly an idea popped into my head. With a small flick I aimed a fainting spell in her direction. She collapsed on the floor in a heap.

I jumped up and went over to her, feeling her pulse, just for the act of course. Then I scooped her up, bridal style, and started to carry her to an empty bed room upstairs. It was only when I picked her up that anyone else moved.

They all jumped up and started talking to me, or yelling in the case of the Gryffindors, I ignored them and started up the stairs. The spell would ware off in about half an hour if I didn't do the counter spell. I went to the next empty bedroom and deposited her in a bed, tucking her inn carefully and summoning a bowl of water and a cloth. I conjured a chair next to her bed and sat down in it before beginning to sponge her forehead, again, it's all in the acting. No one but granger would ever know I'd caused the fainting - if she didn't tell them anyway.

A few seconds later everyone burst into the room. They went silent when they noticed me wiping her forehead with the cloth.

Potter and Weasley looked at me like I was crazy, "what are you doing? Since when did you care about her welfare?"

I looked at them, making a bit my hurt show on my face, "I'm just trying to help her." well that was the truth, "and anyway, even if I didn't want to help her, I'd have to, remember my rules? I have to be kind to everyone."

I flashed them a big smile to distract them from me reverting the spell, non-verbally of course, before I went back to wiping her forehead.

I paused as she started to stir. Letting out a small groan, she blearily opened her eyes, focusing them on me, the nearest person.

"Draco? What happened? I remember blacking out…" I raised my eyebrows at the use of my first name, but answered anyway.

"We don't know what happened, all we know is that suddenly you got all dizzy and fainted, so I carried you up here and we waited for you to wake up.

Potter and Weaselby pushed past me as they went to fawn over their 'ill' friend. I left them too it.

"Hey _Hermione_," I said, emphasizing the use of her first name and earning a lot of shocked stares from everyone, "I'll go get you your book, shall I?"

Her eyes brightened at the prospect of finally getting to read her book and she nodded enthusiastically, a collected groan was heard by the rest of the room.

"Malfoy, don't give her the book! She'll never get up again!" Ginny was complaining already as I headed out the door.

I came back five minutes later with pride and prejudice in my hands, I'd read the blurb on the way up, it actually looked okay. Not that I'd ever tell anyone that of course.

When I walked into the room Hermione looked up in anticipation. When she saw the book a huge smile lit up her whole face. The rest of the group groaned. The only people left in the room were the rest of the trio, Lovegood and Weaselette.

I chucked the book to her where it landed neatly in her lap.

"Thanks! What I can't work out is why I fainted though."

She looked around at us in confusion. The same expression was mirrored on everyone else's faces, except for mine. When she glanced at me for a second I gave her a very obvious wink, grinned hugely and motioned towards her book. She looked at me startled, then realized what I was trying to say and flashed me a grin before yawning hugely and picking up her book.

"Have fun!" I called out to her before sauntering out of the room, rather pleased with myself, I must say.

Unfortunately I was only half way down the hall when they cornered me.

"What the hell are you playing at ferret?" Hissed Weasley. Potter nodded furiously beside him while Weaselette glowered at me and Lovegood stared at me dreamily.

I, meanwhile, was extremely affronted.

"Did it ever occur to you that I was just trying to help?" I was being rather polite to them, not yelling, or hissing, or anything really; just talking in a calm, friendly voice. They however were not.

"Why on earth would you want to help her? You've hated us all since we started school, nothing's changed. We know you're up to something, even if Hermione doesn't." it was still Weasley talking, he was so gonna get bagged out for not doing his homework tomorrow.

I rolled my eyes, "in case you don't remember I actually asked to be Harry's friend in year 1; _he_ refused. What can I say, I didn't like being rejected. And for your information, I'm not up to anything, I'm just being nice, something you would do well to have a go at."

They all gaped at me. I raised my eyebrows waiting for a response. Luna was the one that gave it, though not directed at me.

"Harry, you never told us he asked to be your friend."

He looked a little worried, "yeah, well, he was rude to Ron."

She sighed "but if you'd agreed to be his friend you could have shown him that what his father had taught him was wrong and that blood doesn't matter and it would have saved everyone a lot of tormenting and trouble at school. He would have been how he is now. I think we should give him a go." She turned and smiled at me, "friends?"

I raised my eyebrows and grinned a bit, "of course."

That was when she threw her arms around me and hugged me really tight. I had trouble breathing. When she finally let go she smiled happily at me and went bounding down the stairs singing what sounded like Babbity Rabbity and the cackling stump turned into a song. I gaped after her – she is so strange sometimes. Everyone else gaped after her as well. Before turning their attention back to me.

Weasley spoke again, "you may have fooled them, but you'll never fool me."

"You're only fooling yourself Weasley." I said, before following Luna down the stairs.

**Please review, I have lots of people reading my story but hardly anyone reviews :( please do, it makes me really happy. Apart from that I have nothing to add, just that I hope you enjoy the story :)**


	7. Chapter 7

Well, I can't say you haven 't been doing your homework.

**I wrote this while eating shortbread and drinking tea. ****Yum. ****I also managed to burn my tongue with the tea **** I hope you enjoy this chapter. And remember: please review!! I have had 353 visitors since I started and only have sixteen reviews. So please, please, please do. I really appreciate it.**

Hermione's P.O.V

I lay in bed staring at the same page in my book without noticing a thing. I don't understand why had he done it? I mean, I know his homework says for him to be nice, but he's going out of his way to be nice. And only to me it would seem. I would have expected nothing more than replying politely to us if we talked to him. Not going through all that effort just so I could read my book! And now I can't even read I'm so distracted. Well, if he comes to visit me later I'll talk to him about it. Though I doubt he will.

It was a couple of hours later that I heard a knock at the door. I was jolted out of my book and stared, disgruntled at the door. The door creaked slowly open and Draco poked his head in. he noticed me looking at him and smiled a bit. You know, he should do that more often, smile. He looks ten times better than he does with that infernal sneer plastered on his face. Oh dear, not these thoughts again. Why is it that I seem to be thinking Draco suddenly attractive? And why do I keep thinking of him as Draco?! He coughed to get me out of my trance.

"I brought you some get well chocolates!" he said smirking slightly at my shocked look.

"But- but- but _you_ made me faint!"

He grinned, "Was it my devilish charm or blinding good looks?"

"Ha. Ha. Ha." Note the sarcasm, "you really are full of yourself aren't you?"

"All for a good reason." He was really starting to tick me off so I decided to change the subject.

"Why _did_ you help me?"

He blinked a bit, looking surprised for some reason I can't imagine, before smiling crookedly at me.

"I'm just… how do I put it… being myself."

I looked at him doubtfully; one eyebrow raised "well," I said dubiously, "I can't say you haven't been doing your homework."

He laughed a bit before sobering, "you don't believe Me." he sighed before giving me a slight smile, "well, I can't say I blame you. Only Luna seems to be able to put the past behind her. I made a new friend!"

I started laughing, "That is so Luna"

"And so not Me." he finished my sentence.

"Well, no." I said, sending a small smile his way.

He sighed again and sat down in the chair next to my bed, tossing the chocolates into my lap.

He looked at me pleadingly, "you could give me a chance you know."

"But why? That's what I don't understand. Why on earth would you want to be friends with _me_? Arch enemy, school rival, book worm, mudblood? You have despised me since before you even knew I existed. Why the change of heart? Why now?"

He looked at me with sadness etched all over his face.

"From the time I was born my parents told me how to act, what to say, what was right and what was wrong – in the pureblood society, in the deatheater society. All that shit I spouted when we were at Hogwarts was what my parents had taught me. And then, as I grew older, I came to realize that what they had told me wrong. They had told me that muggleborns were stupid; lower than us, dirt under our shoes, not worthy to be in our company. And then as I saw you grow up you were the exact opposite of what my parents had taught me, brightest witch of our age, proud, loyal, and trustworthy, a better person than most purebloods that I had been forced to meet. But even after I had realized that my parents were wrong there was nothing I could do. On the occasion that I strayed from their ways they would beat me, torture me, what ever they felt like at the time. Lock me in the dungeon for a week. But now I'm free of them, free to live my own life, how I want it to be."

I stared at him in horror and sympathy about how he had been treated. When I saw the tears trailing down his face I automatically leaned over and wrapped my arms tightly around him. His arms wound round me as he cried into my shirt. I had never seen him looking so lost, so venerable. It made me terribly sad to see him so distraught.

But even feeling all that, I had to ask.

"Do- do you have any, you know, scars, from them?"

He pulled back slightly and looked at me worriedly. Then, without a word he turned around and tugged his shirt over his head.

I gasped in shock. There were three long white scars traveling from the base of his neck to three quarters way down his back.

He put his shirt back on and turned back to me, smiling grimly.

"They were always very careful to heal any wounds they made. But when I failed in killing Dumbledore, well, let's just say they cut a little too deep."

I was in shock, "that's so horrible." I barely managed to choke out a whisper.

My eyes locked with his and my breathing hitched as he slowly began to lean towards me. Suddenly there was a huge bang and we both turned with a start towards the door, instinctively leaning away from each other.

The cause of the interruption: Ronald Weasley. Of course.

His eyes flickered between us suspiciously.

"What are you doing?" he asked, attempting to be inconspicuous as he continued to eye us suspiciously.

I sighed in frustration, "having a conversation Ronald. Something you would do well to have a go at."

I heard Draco chuckle quietly beside me.

Ron looked a bit sheepish, but then glared at Draco.

"Well, you may have blinded Hermione and Luna, but I will find out what you're doing, mark my words."

My eyes flashed as I listened to him, "_Ronald Billius Weasley! You insolent little toe-rag! Get out of my room right now! How dare you insult my intelligence and my friend right in front of me?!"_ I was shrieking with rage and I saw him shoot me a terrified glance before his expression hardened and he turned and stalked out of the room. I heard his voice carrying from down the hallway.

"I'll be here for you when he hurts you Hermione, remember that."

I heaved a sigh and turned back to Draco. He was looking at me in shock.

"Did you just call me your friend?"

I smiled, "I guess I did."


	8. Chapter 8

Could you get any stupider?

Please review!

Hermione's P.O.V

Luna and I stood together in a corner of the kitchen. Ron, Harry and Ginny had cornered us in the morning when we had come down stairs. Stupidly, I had left my wand on my bed side table. Luna had left hers in the shower. So now, basically, we were getting an earful about how awful Draco and his friends are and how we had changed over to the dark side.

"I mean, how could you Mione? We've been your friends since year one and he has been your enemy, yet you still choose him over us!" Ronald was still spouting at us after about 10 minutes.

I looked quickly at my watch. 5 minutes until the therapist arrived, if I could just keep them yelling at us till then. Well, they would get in some deep shit; Especially Ronald and Ginevra.

"And look! You're not even denying it! You think that he actually wants to be your friend, but he doesn't! You two are just pawns in some sick game he's playing!"

I glared at my so called friends.

"You say that we are choosing him over you; we are not! You are the ones who refuse to be our friends if we are being friends with them. I thought we would mean a bit more to you than some petty disagreement." I could feel tears trailing down my face as I yelled at them. Ron shook his head angrily.

"See! And now you're trying to push it off on us! He's trying to take you two away from us, and he's obviously succeeded."

I heard the front door open as he yelled at us.

"You can't just throw us away like old toys now you have your new friends."

I noticed the therapist standing in the doorway, staring at us in shock. I looked at the three people in front of me and sighed, tears still falling down my face.

"Maybe when you open your eyes I'll be able to forgive you. But while you are blinded by your prejudice I shall no longer call you my friends." I saw Luna nod sadly beside me.

"I'm sorry Ron, but I need to stand up for myself." She whispered. She was crying as well now, and we all spun around when we heard the Slytherins thundering down the stairs. They stopped in shock in the opposite doorway to Dr Cross.

Cross cleared his throat as his eyes flickered between us all. I grabbed Luna's hand and pushed through my old friends to stand with the Slytherins. Draco looked at me worriedly; I grabbed his hand and squeezed it reassuringly. If possible, Dr Cross looked even more shocked.

"Ah, well, I seem to have missed a lot. Well, come now, sit down at the table and we can begin our session. He sat down in the middle seat of the huge dining table as he spoke. We all went and sat at one end, while the other three sat at the other. I sat at the head, with Draco on one side and Luna on the other, Blaise sat next to Draco and Vince and Greg sat on the other side of Luna.

I was facing Ronald and Ginevra and Harry sat on either side. I couldn't help thinking about how much it was like a face off. The thought made me smile.

The therapist looked between the two groups. He cleared his throat again.

"Yes, umm, why don't we start off with how people's homework went?"

I raised an eyebrow "Draco did very well. He didn't get angry with anyone the whole time, or if he did, he kept it to himself. He helped me out when no one else would and managed to make two new friends. Blaise was also very good yesterday, he didn't make one suggestive comment, which I heard anyway, and hung out with Ginevra and me for at least 6 hours. He also managed to restrain himself from a certain temptation. Ronald and Ginevra on the other hand have gotten furious with both Luna and I within the last 15 hours. You saw it with your own eyes. That is all _I _can comment on. Although I can say that I was taken away from my book at least 5 times yesterday before I fainted." I folded my arms over my chest and looked at Dr Cross.

"Good, very good: Any other comments?"

Vince scratched his head, "I only ate 3 meals since you came?"

I giggled a bit. I happened to know that his version of a meal was two dinner plates choc-a-block with all kinds of food.

No one else said anything.

Mr Therapist looked a tad uncomfortable as we all glared at random objects or people around the room.

"Alright then, now I want to know the whole story as to what has happened in this house to make it so… volatile."

We all burst out talking at once.

Draco – "it all started with this stupid thing that people have falsely named therapy."

Luna – "I really do think that those filleting groobles have something to do with it."

Ronald – "its all because of that stupid git Malfoy! He's up to something, I'm telling you!"

Harry – "It's that game of truth or dare that stuffed everything up, just cause play boy Zabini asked that stupid question!."

Blaise – "I reckon it started when Hermione woke up us Slytherins yesterday morning for therapy. I'd say she started enjoying the view, if ya know what I mean!"

Me – "BLAISE!"

The therapist held up a hand.

"Mr Zabini, what did I say about suggestive comments?" He sighed.

Blaise held both his hands up, "hey, I wasn't saying that about me! I was saying it about a certain blonde sitting next to me." he winked at me as I continued to glower. Draco just looked confused.

"Very well, mister Zabini, why don't you start from the beginning? People can add anything in that you have missed out at the end."

And so, the torture began.


	9. Chapter 9

Barriers.

**Oh merlin, guys I am soooo sorry I haven't updated in so long! Its this annoying little thing called writers block that keeps sneaking into my brain. But hopefully, as its school holidays, I'll get another chappie up by the end of them! I hope you like it, its abit of a filler, but I needed to set it up for the next chapter. Read and review please.**

Hermione's P.O.V

I hate you Blaise. I truly, truly hate you.

"And she was totally gawping at Draco but being the imbecile he is he didn't notice the lady looking at him…"

"Ginny decided we were playing truth or dare and I asked this question…"

"So then they picked each other and Ginny over there picked me, of course…"

"And D was helping her get better, something that golden boy and his pet Weasel have trouble understanding."

"Then Weasley and potter cornered Draco when he left her room, D made friends with Hermione and Luna and then this morning we come down and they are attacking our new friends!"

I seriously feel like banging my head on the table repeatedly after Blaise's recount of events, no matter how truthful he may be.

Cross looks a tad worried as he wipes his forehead with the back of his hand. I can literally see the sweat sheen on his face.

He clears his throat.

"Well. I can see that some of you took my assignments quite seriously… but I am afraid that I will have to take more serious measures this time. This is the new rule. Until you can be with someone with out feeling hate or anger you shall not be allowed to talk to them."

Outraged gasps come from the other end of the table.

Ron – you have no right to keep us from our friends

Draco – well then, you just admitted that they would be counted in the group of people you feel hate and anger towards

Harry – Hermione and Luna are still our friends

Blaise – friends you won't be able to talk to because you hate and are angry at… oh, reeal good friends you are.

Ginny – how dare you speak so patronizingly to us! What do you know about real friendship!

Draco – a whole lot more than you apparently

Me – SHUT UP ALL OF YOU!

Silence, blissful silence.

Our Mr. Therapist looks nervous. I can't imagine why. (Note the sarcasm).

"Ah, yes, well, I think I know who won't be talking for a while. Now that's all sorted I think I shall leave… Arthur was supposed to be here by now, but I suppose…"

The door bursts open as Arthur stumbles in looking flustered.

"Oh, Merlin, I'm so sorry I'm late I was stuck in a meeting about you know who and then…"

He trails off as he notices our seating arrangement. I smile at him sadly and he frowns slightly before shaking it off. Cross relays all that just passed between us to arthur before hurrying out the door.

Mr.. Weasley looks at us all sadly.

"well, the only way I can trust you to do as you're told is to put a spell on you. _perosus contego!_"

I feel a sense of safety wash over me and turn to look at everyone else. My friends smile at me. my old friends open their mouths but suddenly look like they've been gagged. I reach under the table and grasp Draco's hand. His grip tightens on mine and I smile hesitantly at him. He grins impishly back.

"so, couldn't take your eyes off me, eh?"

I feel a blush rise in my cheeks, but grin a bit anyway "what can I say, your boxers were a particularly nice colour."

He frowns a bit and I can practically see him trying to remember what colour his boxers were.

Between you and me, they were red.

**Hope you enjoyed it! perosus contego is latin for hateful shield (that may be slightly incorrect as I used an online translator for it) :/ please, please, pleeeaaaasseee review. Its greaty appreciated.**


	10. Chapter 10

monopoly

Hermione's P.O.V

I can practically feel my old friend's eyes boring into me wherever I am. It's disconcerting, I can tell you that. And I think it highly unfair that they are angry at us when they are the ones that announced we wouldn't be able to talk until they didn't hate us anymore.

Luna and I have taken to spending our time with the slytherins now. They really aren't as bad as I thought they would be, yes, even Vince and Greg. And there's no more last names anymore either.

Draco, Blaise, Luna and I are playing monopoly at the moment. I found it in the attic this morning, and, though it took a while to explain, the game is going quite smoothly now. Although we are being rather loud.

Blaise – Mayfair! I got Mayfair!

Me – Ahhh, but I want Mayfair! I've had park lane for ages!

Draco – five… one, two, three, four, five. Hey! Community chest! GO TO JAIL!!! NOT AGAIN!!!!

Luna – I think my motel is broken.

We all look at her strangely.

"Uh, Luna?"

"Yes Hermione."

"Motels can't break"

A look of relief passes over her face, "oh, thank Merlin! I was getting very worried."

Blaise starts to chuckle but stops when he sees where he's going to land.

"I don't want to go to jail!"

I laugh at him and Draco smiles happily, "hooray! I have a friend!!"

I giggle a bit… then it's my roll.

Double sixes. Bond Street. Perfect!

"I'll buy it thanks mister banker, mister real-estate!" I nod to Draco and Blaise while smiling at the irritated look on Blaise's. He owns the other two. I carefully place the title deed in my ever growing pile and pick up the dice again.

A five and a six. Kings cross station. Hahahaha, another title deed that someone else wants.

"I'll take it!"

This time its Dracos turn to groan. And his turn to roll.

A three… and a four. He groans in frustration, oh, whatever, I give up. Heres fifty bucks in the middle."

Blaise pouts, "what, don't you like my company D?"

We all laugh.

Luna picks up the die and roll them across the board. Marylebone station.

"Rent! Rent!" Draco looks thrilled that he finally remembered to call for rent. The last few times he's been in jail and the four times before that he forgot to say rent. Luna grudgingly hands over her money.\

Suddenly she shouts out in alarm.

"oh no! Draco! Let me see the money I just gave you!"

We all look at her weirdly and Draco holds out the notes. With a happy cry Luna pounces on one of them and sits back holding it in her hands anad smiling.

"uh Luna? I kinda need that money."

Luna looks down trodden as she holds out the note. Then she sparks up. She picks up another note of the same value (50 monopoly dollars) and looks at Draco very seriously.

"would it be okay if I were to give you this note instead."

"umm… yeah?"

She sighs in relief, "thank merlin for that, I would have been very upset if I'd had to give this note away."

We all look at her strangely, but no one bothers to comment. You get used to this behavior after a while.

Blaise is about to roll again when the kitchen door bangs open a group of furious ex-friends walk in. (you know who I'm taking about)

We earn a set of angry glares from them and Ronald chucks a scrap of paper to Draco. With his seeker reflexes Draco snatches it out of the air and reads it quickly before snorting and passing it to Blaise. He then looks up at Ronald who gives him another dirty. Draco just frowns and shakes his head. I then grab a piece of scrap parchment and an old pen out of my pocket and scribble a note on it. I throw it to ron before turning away.

I can see his reflection in an old pot hanging opposite to me and watch his expression turn angry as he reads my note.

_Obviously they truly like us, or we wouldn't be talking._

He turns and stalks from the room. I smile grimly. Someday he'll have to face the facts.


	11. Chapter 11

_I'm so sorry I haven't updated for an AGE! I feel terrible, I hope this makes up for it though. I mean, I found it very fun to write personally, so I hope you find it interesting to read! Remember, review!_

Everywhere I go Ginny seems to be hovering around. I mean, really, get a life! It's creepy, I'll just be sitting there reading a book and then I'll look up and there she is! It's disconcerting. Sometimes it seems like she's about to talk to me, but then she'll shut her mouth and walk off. I suppose that has something to do with that spell that Mr. Weasley put on us.

I'm staring vacantly at a really ugly pink wall, thinking about how someone really ought to paint it, when Draco comes into the room.

"Hey," he smiles at me, honestly I'm still getting used to the fact that Draco Malfoy can, in fact, smile, "what are you thinking about."

"Umm, before you walked in, or after you walked in?"

He tilts his head, "both!"

"Well," I start in a-matter-of-fact voice, "I was just thinking about how I'm still coming to terms with the fact that you can smile, and before you came in I was thinking about how ugly that wall is and that I think someone should paint it."

He laughs then grins madly, something like the Cheshire cat, and looks excitedly at me.

"Well, why don't _we_ paint the wall?"

I blink slowly at him. That's not a terrible idea actually...

I quickly summon up some crimson paint and a couple of paint rollers and brushes. Draco looks at the paint and frowns.

"red, are you kidding me?"

I look at him grumpily, "of course red! What other colour would suit this room?"

He rolls his eyes as if there's an obvious answer, "green of course."

I scoff loudly, "as if _that_ would look good in here!"

"It would!" he cries out in protest, "it would suit the couches!"

I look at the couches, "Draco, the couches are blue." My voice is dead pan, "blue and green are too similar it'll look terrible."

We glare at each other for a moment before a sly grin creeps across his face.

"well, if you like red so much then..." he shrugs and bends over, dipping a paint brush into the paint. I smile, finally he's co-operating!

My smile fades when he straightens up and flicks the red paint all over me.

"AAARRGGGGHHH! I WILL KILL YOU DRACO MALFOY!" he just laughs at my shrieks.

I quickly summon up a bucket of green paint and slosh its entire contents at him.

He yells as the entire front of his body is drenched in green paint. I laugh maniacally. I stop when I notice him picking up the red pain, an evil grin spreading over his face.

I squeal and run madly in the other direction, I can hear him running after me. I don't see it, but I certainly feel the cold, thick paint slosh down my back. My scream is piercing. I like to think of it as a war cry.

I turn, pulling my wand out again and point it at him. Orange paint sprays out of its tip and hits him in the stomach.

He yells out in mock anger, "THIS MEANS WAR!"

"GET READY TO LOSE!" my piercing yell is rather imposing, or, well, I think so anyway.

Draco pulls out his wand and shoots hot pink paint in my face. I splutter and growl at him. I. Hate. Pink.

I return with a large jet of red paint. Take that, green lover!

We are so loud, screaming war cries and such at each other while painting, that we don't hear the thundering of many people coming down the stairs.

"What on earth are you two doing?"

Blaise's voice breaks through our paint fight.

We pause and slowly turn towards him together. Everyone is standing there. I look down at myself and then at Malfoy. We are both covered in all the colours of the rainbow and more. I look back at Blaise and grin sheepishly.

"we were deciding what colour to paint the wall?" I ask hopefully.

He raises an eyebrow and looks pointedly around the room. I follow his gaze.

It looks like a messed up rainbow.

I glance at Draco, he meets my gaze. I giggle a bit.

"well, I think this solves our problem."


	12. Chapter 12

Hermione's P.O.V

I sigh, feeling the hot water wash over me.

Thank Merlin for who ever created showers right?

The water is like a rainbow, swirling away down the plug hole. My rainbow shower; a result of my paint war with Draco. Its funny how thing happen though; who would've thought it, unable to talk with the rest of the trio and my best girlfriend and tight with the death eaters sons. Makes you wonder.

I have to say though, it has been very refreshing being friends with the Slytherin boys, especially Draco, it's nice to have some intelligent conversation every now and then!

Still, I do miss the others. If only they weren't so bloody stubborn!

Oh look, the water is clear. I glance at the seven taps on the wall. I glance up at the six shower heads all pointing at me. Hmmm.

I twist a purple tap. A jet of pink froth shoots toward my face.

IN MY MOUTH!

mmm... strawberries.

Wait a second; I don't think it's too healthy to consume flavoured and scented froth.

Woops.

How about this one. Green tap.

Unnggg, I love mint sooooo much.

Yellow tap?

Wow. Why is yellow mist coming out of a shower head? It's warm. Like sunshine. Oh, I do love magic.

Look I'm standing in a field of green grass with strawberries covering the ground and I'm basking in the sunlight!

White tap.

Ooohhhhh, BUBBLES!

Now it's snowing in my beautiful meadow, and it's all around me! I love snow!

Last tap. Purple.

Purple flakes.

"AARRRRGGGHHHHHHH!"

I HATE LAVENDER!

I flounder around in the shower, trying to escape the horrendous flakes of scented soap. NOT THE LAVENDER!

It is very hard to find the shower door handle when you are up to your shoulders in froth AND IT'S STILL RISING BECAUSE YOU FORGOT TO TURN OFF THE LAVENDER TAP AND NOW YOU CAN'T SEE IT!

I tumble out of the shower.

The lavender is following me!

I run to the door and throw it open. And snap it shut again.

Woops. Forgot I was naked for a second there.

I wade through the offending foam and grab a towel before turning as quickly as possible and running to the door, throwing it open again and running into the hallway.

"oof."

What on earth did I just land on?

Oh. Hello Draco.

Wait a second, DRACO?

I shriek and jump off him, hitching up the small froth encased towel that is supposed to be covering my body. Then I tug it down a bit again.

I start edging off to the side as Malfoy gets up of his unfortunate position on the floor. Maybe if I keep edging away he won't notice me!

I keep edging.

He stands up and looks around.

I edge a bit faster.

Oh no. He saw me.

"Hermione?"

I blink at him a bit.

"so, you've had a shower hey? I've also had a shower. Though I think I will continue it in a different shower because I can't say I'm too fond of the one I just exited."

He looks at me like I'm insane. Then we both look at the bathroom I just exited.

Purple flakes and froth are pouring slowly out the door and into the hallway.

I look sheepishly back at him.

He picks up a bit and sniffs it, wrinkling his nose.

"lavender? Really?"

I shake my head. I seem to have gone mute. Perhaps I'm allergic to lavender and it makes me unable to speak. That would explain my extreme distaste for it!

He walks toward me, holding the lavender flakes in his hand. I watch it suspiciously.

I back away.

I back away a bit faster.

Then...

BAM!

It's on my head.

"I HATE LAVENDER!"

And. Oh wow, how did that happen?

I'm falling down the stairs.


	13. Chapter 13

_Sorry about the wait guys. Hope you enjoy and please review!_

Draco's P.O.V

I stare in shock at the crumpled heap at the bottom of the stairs that is Hermione.

Quickly I run down the stairs until I'm crouching next to her.

"Shit!" there's a large bruise forming on her forehead and a few more on her arms and lower back.

I blink a couple of times. I have a feeling I shouldn't be able to see her lower back at the moment.

"What the hell mate?"

I look up in shock to see Blaise standing in the doorway staring at Hermione.

I wince, "uhh, she fell down the stairs."

Suddenly I come to a realisation. Slowly I pull the small towel up so it's a little more decent. Then the thundering of footsteps shows the arrival of... the rest of the household. Merlin be damned but this has gotta look bad.

I look around shiftily.

"Luna!"

She looks mildly at me.

"Hermione has fallen down the stairs."

I notice Ron staring at Hermione creepily.

I tug up the towel a little further.

"Mind taking her to her room and getting her clothed?"

Luna smiles and drifts over to us. I suddenly have an idea.

Quickly I whip out my wand.

And am faced with three more. I look at Harry, Ron and Ginny; disgruntled.

I stare at them while slowly pointing my wand at Hermione.

"Enervate"

I watch as Hermione twitches slightly, then crinkles her face, blinks a few times a starts to sit up. I quickly push her back down.

"Oi! What was that for!" she winces and rubs her head where it hit the floor. Perhaps I pushed her down a bit hard.

I smile innocently, "you weren't holding your towel up."

She glances around a bit and notices everyone staring at her.

"oh, right. well thanks then. Wait, why am I sitting down here in a towel in the first place?"

I glance at her, waiting, waiting; her eyes widen.

"you smooshed lavender on me! YOU GIT!"

I wince, "only a little bit."

"BUT U JUST TOLD YOU HOW MUCH I HATED LAVENDER! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO MEEEEEE?"

I cover my ears. Dear Merlin that woman can scream.

Hermione's P.O.V

Bloody git, bloody Draco getting bloody lavender on me, making me fall down the bloody stairs. Getting bloody lavender in my...

"HAIR!"

Everyone stares at me oddly.

"YOU GOT LAVENDER IN MY HAIR! Do you know how long it takes me to get anything out my hair mister? Have you SEEN my hair lately?"

I gesture wildly at the mass of ridiculously messy, wet hair residing on my head.

He winces. Again. What a pygmy puff.

He sits next to me thinking for a moment before his eyes light up.

I look at him suspiciously, "what are you thinking about?"

He grins.

"Draco." I look at him in warning.

"don't worry Hermione; I can get the lavender out of your hair, easy as pumpkin juice!"

I blink, "really?"

He grins maniacally, "what's magic for? ACCIO LAVENDER FLAKES!"

I watch happily as the lavender flakes fly out of my hair and into his hands. Then I pause. What on earth is that...?

I look up the stairs.

So does Draco.

"AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGHHHHHHHHHH!" we both jump up and run away.

I glare at him as we flee.

"YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN MORE SPECIFIC!"

He glares back, "YEAH? WELL YOU SHOULD HAVE TURNED THE BLOODY TAP OFF!"

The screams of our housemates resonate behind us as they are overcome by the terror that chases us.

Then suddenly it hits me and I'm buried under a mountain of lavender flakes. I hear a groan next to me. well, at least Draco's stuck here too.

I feel sick as the smell of lavender surrounds me. then I scowl.

"Draco. I hate you."

I shift slightly under the flakes and run a hand through my hair.

My hair.

"MY HAIR!"


	14. Chapter 14

Long time no see, huh? Well – I'M BACK!

NOW ONWARDS – TO INFINITY AND BEYOONNNNDDDDD!

Draco's P.O.V

Dinner is an extremely quiet affair. We're all sitting around the large table – each at our respective ends, obviously. All I can hear is the scraping of cutlery, the weasel's slobbering over his enormous amount of food, and Luna's distanced humming. I scrunch up my nose at the… goop on my plate.

Apparently it's meatloaf and mashed potatoes.

Let me simply say that if I were Blaise I would not be letting Weasley anywhere near the damn kitchen. THAT'S WHAT HOUSE ELVES ARE FOR, DAMMIT!

I sniff disgustedly. I don't think it helps that the scent of lavender is still lingering. Everywhere.

Despite the fact that it's been a whole day since the whole lavender event.

Personally I think that Potter specifically used lavender scented cleaning charms simply to spite us.

I'd blame the Weasel's too, but they seemed to have trouble with the concept of getting a spell right. All they managed was to multiply the lavender flakes by… like… A MILLION!

I huff again, still poking at the mush on my plate.

"TINKY!"

Everyone starts at my outburst and stares at me oddly.

I sit and wait for the crack.

The sound not the… never mind.

Strangely I'm not hearing anything… WHY IS THERE NO CRACKING SOUND!

"TIIINNNKKKKYYYYY! SAVE ME!"

"Honestly Draco, what is Tinky and why are you screaming for it!"

I sink back into my chair.

I think the everlasting scent of lavender and no edible substance is making me insane.

I pout, "I want Tinky."

"What is Tinky?"

I glance at her, "my house elf – OBVIOUSLY!"

Hermione blinks – "your house elf?"

I smile, "Yup! Raised it myself – I even _named_ it!"

There's a collective snort from around the table.

I'm offended! What do they think they're snorting at?

"You named your house elf… _Tinky._"

Argh – the disdain, it's killing me!

"That's his short name. His whole name is Tinky-Winky!"

I grin proudly, remembering the day I named my house elf.

My statement is met with gales of laughter.

I sniff and stand up suddenly.

"The only reason I want him here is so that I don't starve to death!"

Then I storm out.

What can I say… that lavender…

Hermione's P.O.V

I watch as Draco storms out.

Well… everyone watches Draco storm out.

There's not really much other entertainment at this dinner.

Still… Tinky-Winky? I snigger.

We all keep watching the vacated doorway.

"Well… someone's grumpy."

Blaise sniggers.

I think about it… you know what? Not even just someone is grumpy! I'd say that on top of both someone and Draco, I'm pretty damn grumpy too!

I mean, offence to Ginny's cooking, she obviously hasn't picked up the wonderful skills her mother has. This is bloody inedible!

The silence is grating on my nerves too – how am I supposed to eat when all I can hear is the scraping of cutlery and various males slobbering over this overcooked dog food!

But you know what the worst part is… THE LAVENDER!

It just doesn't know when to let go!

Not only is the scent of it in the air, it is embedded in the wooden floors, the bathroom, my favorite couch, all the towels in the house (don't even ask me how it got to all the other towels, there are several bathrooms in this house and as far as I know, I ONLY FLOODED ONE!) and IT'S IN MY HAIR!

Suddenly I can no longer stand it.

I push my chair back suddenly and the sound of it scraping against the floorboards breaks the once again heavy silence. Standing I make my way to the door and storm out angrily.

As I'm leaving I hear someone muttering at the table.

"I wonder what got in their hair."

I growl.

"LAVENDER!"


End file.
